Two relatives passing away in a span of one week may just be too much. Not unbearable in its truest sense, since I don't really have a close relationship with them. Too much uncertainty, too much reality. And when reality rears its ugly head, our tendency is to run off in the opposite direction.

No, reality isn't always this disconcerting. There's the reality of life and love, the ones we've come to experience and revel in. The fact that everything is potentially beautiful, the comfort you find in family and friends. The thrill in knowing there is more to conquer, there's more of the world you have to see. The happiness which emanate from people, and the love you're willing to give in return. These are endless retaliations to all that we consider cynical, hoping against hope that life would be infinite.

Then another reality sinks in. The reality that renders an abrupt end to everything --- plans, dreams, life. When people you've actually known pass away, death becomes tangible. We're not faced with minor changes but major life overhauls, where people and families are involved. We're reminded that everything is fleeting, that we have no control at all over things.

An uncle in Florida passed away because of complications due to leukemia. He was diagnosed just a few months ago, just when he was about to retire and planning annual vacations in the Philippines and Europe with his family. He was under chemotherapy a few weeks after that, then he was bedridden. Then we received the news that he died of cardiac arrest. Now tell me what's reality.

An aunt in Tarlac passed away this morning because of excessive bleeding after a normal childbirth. The baby lived, but she failed to make it through. A life in exchange for a life --- it's almost hurtfully ironic. Now tell me what's reality.

In some ways, life may be the euphemism for death. You're given the chance to live just to mask the grave fate we're all headed to. Incidentally, we need not follow this train of thought. Seeing through that perspective defeats the purpose of living, giving little importance to all that makes the ride worthwhile.

Experiences yield consequential results. You either dwell on it or move on. In times like these, you wonder if we live to die, or if we die in order to live.

Love precedes life, and life entails loving. We have to remember that because we could not afford to be disillusioned. When euphemisms, whether abstract or definitive, aren't enough, it could only mean one thing: you're closer to the truth.

And the truth tells me I'm only human, and I could only know so much.